Survival | The Office

Negotiating your way around the office as a 20 something can be a daunting affair. Veteran office-workers will pressure you, school playground style, into being the tea-maker, the phone-answerer and the one who asks the bosses if you can all leave early on a Friday. Don’t be that person. ‘Survival – The Office’ is a post armed with nifty tips and tricks to battle your way through the corporate jungle (caution: apply advice at your own risk).

The Kit

• Vibrant post-its: maximise the charade of efficiency. Scatter across your laptop screen, desk and chair (these are mostly for your boss’s benefit but they also brighten a gloomy day with their highlighter shades of luminous green and yellow). Be careful to avoid people’s personal space with post-it-overload.
• Glasses: wear even if not prescribed. Office Chic.
• Attractive desk accessories: this includes: notepads, calendars, and essentially anything that will enhance the appearance of those faux wood desks. NB: this may create serious desk-envy amongst your colleagues. Be prepared to have to shrug off jealous looks and sly hisses about your Kate Spade notepaper (purchase below).

 

 

Tea Breaks

Never, repeat never, align yourself with roll of dedicated-tea-maker. Timing is crucial. As much as you want to be first in line for the kettle when 12.30 roles around, it’s not worth the daily parrot squawk from Liz at reception: ‘weak with two sugars, love!’. No. Thank. You.

All office workers will be accustomed to the stampede whenever someone announces the words ‘staff room’ and ‘cake’. Ply your colleagues with sweet treats for when you need them to cover for you, they’ll never let you down. Fact.

My final offering of tea break guidance comes in the form of crockery. Buy your own mug and assure that everyone knows it’s yours, even at the risk of looking possessive (we all have our quirks). No one likes the morning battle with the clean cups in the dishwasher.

Trick of the Time

Counting down how many seconds are passing between your phone call to Bob in finance and your email to Kelly in PR can be a tiresome affair, so to brighten up your day, make sure to set your watch to be a bit slower than everyone else. You’ll get a very pleasant surprise when it’s time to pack up at the end of the day! It’s the little things…

What I’m Wearing

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Jumper | Zara, similar linked below

Shirt | H&M, similar linked below

Trousers | H&M, here

Shoes | River Island, similar linked below

Bag | Gucci, similar linked below

Fur Scarf | Zara, similar linked below