How to be Metropolitan

striped tee

flared black trousers

Sounds good, doesn’t it? Metropolitan. The Metropolis. Bright lights, big city. All you need to know about how to conquer the concrete jungle is below… 

Gym, gym, gym GYM! GYM!

If you’re not in the gym by 5.30am you’re already off to a catastrophically bad start to achieving metropolis status. You get up at 5am, you power through a home-made, ultra-cleansing smoothie and you’re lifting 20kg weight in one hand whilst replying to emails with the other by 5.30. If a 20kg is too much for you, switch to a 15’er…

Profess Your Working Hours To Everyone You Come Across

This one should come with a warning. Only profess your hours if you do long ones. Part time, 9-5 or just pure laziness doesn’t exist in the metropolitan world. Breaks are for losers. Exhaustion is chic. If you’re doing your emails at 5.30 then your work day has begun. And if you happen to go for after-work drinks with a colleague then your work day could stretch, with creative licence, to 9pm (even if you’re just bitching about the guy who leaves tuna sandwiches in the office fridge). Nonetheless, an early morning to late evening workday is standard, and is also something you certainly shouldn’t keep to yourself! Go forth and profess your work ethic.

Drink Cosmopolitans

Because it rhymes with metropolitan. And Carrie Bradshaw did it: the ultimate Metropolitan woman.

Visit an Art Gallery

Metropole girls are cultured. Very cultured. Google something cultured. Like a painting! Then go and visit it. Remember it’s name. Use it in conversation. There’s nothing like faking it ’till you’ve made it (as you’ll probably have realised if you’ve read any other posts on The Millennial Girl’s Guide…). There’s nothing like a few exaggerations and white lies to get you through life…

flared black trousers

Speak Quickly. Really quickly. Quick quick quick. Really quick.

…Adding hand gestures for real emphasis. Talking at high-speed is sign that your life is full, busy, stuffed! You’re trying to keep a lid on it all and talking quickly is the only way to stop that lid from spilling out all of your out-of-control-ness onto the world. Talk fast, avoid spillage.

Book in for a Facial that Causes Pain

If you haven’t shed blood in a non-invasive skincare treatment then you’re definitely not on Metropolis status. Beauty treatments aren’t for fun. The sign of a can-take-on-the-world, does-everything-herself kinda woman is, without doubt, her ability to endure an onslaught of pain-inducing facials.

Coffee Should Only Come in Takeaway Cups

No time! Nope. No time to sit down. Going, going, gone. Zwooosshhh!! She’s gone! Left the building! Did you see her?!

That’s how fast you should be getting your coffee. NO TIME!

Oh, and not even time for a concluding sentence! Goodbye everyone, thanks for reading!

flared black trousers

flared black trousers

What I’m Wearing

Top | Independent French shop, similar linked below

Trousers | Topshop, linked below

Leather Jacket | Loavies, here

Earrings | Jane Koenig, here

Bag | Gucci, similar linked below


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